"Phantasia 2k" by the Council of Doom (with a special shout-out to Kool Keith) With my six legs, carapace, mandible and mantis eyes See kids like me mothers contemplate infanticide Lone locust of the apocalypse, VH1 rocks my clips My tour bus is hydraulic rocket-ships Command super-intelligent sewer rats, take my power from Third rail transformers, drink the blood of street performers Mummies and suits of armor break-dance at Natural History A vagrant's blessing is the secret of my mystery cult Indoctrination beneath Pennsylvania Station Fakes get shoved into my EZ-Bake oven Fake Rolexes in red velvet Chinatown hallways Scribble rhymes on stenotype, copyright my genotype Subliminal plots to assassinate Steinbrenner Secret meetings with Frank White in Rockefeller Center The Statue of Liberty sets Gracie Mansion afire I eat breakfast at Tiffany's, lunch at Gray's Papaya I Mix Stolichnaya into my serum Order caviar from the Russian Tea room My Metrocard is inter-dimensional Jake Pease, my indestructible sentinel Police on Broadway look at me an odd way But those who disgrace me wind up working late at Macy's Crazier than Black Israel freestylin' Give it back to the Injuns, I'll sink this lonely island (I made the kid in Blair Witch throw away the damn map) Jake Pease, the murderous, the evil mastermind Trick, Please, you've heard of us, to us the law is blind The menacing leader of the inter-city council The Doom is at hand across the land so get a pencil Write down my stats: Untouchable Evil genius Endowed like I was the arts, but that's between us I got a army of mutants like I was Doctor Xavier I'm out of my padded cell for good behavior I'm your neighbor, I hide out up in the suburbs Right now I'm Metropolitan politician, I'm throwing verbs And swerves and spins I wins elected office In a much better place to get the Feds up off us Me and Doc, the bug-eyed bandit--it's just how we planned it Gonna take over the planet, the reinforcements landed Mighty Matt the Space Pirate, he's always up to no good He's in on the plot so we know it's gonna go good Or well, oh well, this is Earth on hell Who's your Daddy now? Who you gonna run and tell? It's a conspiracy, we control mass transit and cellphones Newspaper's are now ours, we control airwaves and bank loans Déjà vu, that's us, we're the ringing in your ears Our mission is clear: that's to bring mad fear I hear the sniper in my house, and I gotsta get of here Then I wake up in the hallway... I've had ten too many beers